Mental Health Care is Complete Bullshit

Breaking the silence on my mental health. I am going to break my silence on a topic that many of you know I have dealt with for a long time: mental health. I told myself the celebrity suicides, I wouldn’t use their deaths for a blog topic, but my own recent experiences have led me […]

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It Was NOT Smooth Sailing

You cannot dwell on regret after the loss of a loved one.

We fought the night before Ben died. We argued back and forth, had a heated discussion, but he apologized, and it was over. Ben looked at me, gave me a huge hug and whispered let’s not fight any more Brooke Christine. We said goodnight, and I left him on the couch. As I walked back […]

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Officer Omelet Reporting for Duty

Being home alone has become part of everyday life when I don’t have the kids. What used to be filled special dates, movies on the couch, and working on our future, is now a huge void not easily filled. Since Ben’s passing, I’ve gotten by, but the pain is still genuinely real. I am able […]

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I Came Across an Email From You

There have been several memes that state you are either one of the two types of email users. The first type of email user has 1,345,675 unread emails, and nothing is ever deleted. I, on the other hand, am the latter type of user who only has unread emails that require my attention and I […]

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Time Is A Crock of Shit!

I want to start by apologizing for my vulgarity. However, its utilization expresses how I feel about the subject, so I will only partially apologize. 😉 Time… The different interactions I had with people since Ben’s passing range from hurtful to treasured; but maintain a pretty consistent message: time heals all… The first couple of […]

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The Gift: Keeping Your Heart Open

After a tragic loss, it is so easy to close off your feelings and do whatever is needed to get through the day-to-day. For me, I had no idea how to deal with the intense emotions of losing my fiance while also trying to manage to be mom and have a career. So I did […]

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New Horizon: You Were So Excited

Your divorce was supposed to be final today. When you had signed the papers you were so anxious to get everything over with and couldn’t decide on what to wear. You sent me this picture before you left to show me what you had finally landed on for an outfit and express your excitement. (Even though […]

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Grief is a Real Bitch!

My shaking stopped this morning. I guess the shock of finding you after you passed is starting to subside. Believe it or not, I was also able to eat two consecutive meals and keep them down. The constant stream of tears has dried up and I’m ready to smile from time to time. I still […]

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Trying to Look Forward

Today there is a burning in my chest. It isn’t indigestion, and I am not sick. This feeling I have never felt before, but I find myself trying to manage its severity with every breath I take. It ignites its power when an unexpected picture appears, a precious memory crosses my mind, or when part […]

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